Monday, January 21, 2013

The Minefield of Ex Gifting


So one of the few ex boyfriends of mine that I actually stayed friends with called me up last week and invited me to his graduation party. I of course graciously and nonchalantly accepted. I never say no to a party. After the flurry of phone calls to my girls to ascertain that they are up for some impromptu gatecrashing, (also I need backup in case the ex gets high and decides to shame me for my old ways *side bar* this guy broke up with me by conference calling me with his friend I was two-timing and putting the call on loudspeaker. After my non-apologetic “whatever you decide” they played for me BeyoncĂ©’s Irreplaceable! And to make sure I’d gotten the message loud and clear, after I’d hang up he texted “to the left, girl!” So yeah, I need back up. But I digress. )

After getting my girls on board I now had to figure out what gift is suitable for him. And I kid you not, this has occupied my entire weekend and 2 hours of browsing Aristoc shelves today! Its like the most complex puzzle ever! What to get him that isn’t too generic (that it seems I didn’t put in any thought) but not too personal that it comes off overthought (and as if I’ve never gotten over him and my dearest hope is a second chance). Something not too expensive to leave me broke for the rest of the month that I resent him ever inviting me, but not too cheap either that he’s insulted.

Now my go-to gift for every (and I mean every – birthdays, farewells, Christmas, valentines, random) occasion is a book. But looks like that won’t cut it this time since I haven’t been tight with ex of late I dunno which books he’s read and couldn’t ask cause I don’t want to spoil the surprise…
Anyway, after a weekend of deep thought I’ve narrowed it down to these choices (reasons for and against in brackets)

What to leave, and what to take? Maybe I should gift a card with the link to this blog post and the inscription "It's the though that counts?


1* Board game – Scrabble or Monopoly. (I figure after all those years in med school he needs some down time to play, right? Except party is tomorrow and I failed to find the games yet. The affordable versions I mean, Aristoc’s scrabble is UGX 150,000. I mean. Come on!)

2*Crossword puzzle Book (He loves crosswords! So yay! We used to always do the Sunday paper’s crossword on the beach after church. Too personal? So nay!)

3* A book (My favorite novels from last year were ‘Room’, ‘The Shack’, and ‘The Glass Castle.’ I have no idea if he’s read any of them. The 2013 ‘Our Daily Bread’ seemed tempting but I don’t know if he’s still that into church and stuff. I loved Malcolm Gladwell’s ‘Outliers’ but the pricetag made me curse under my breath and send glowering looks to the Aristoc dude patrolling the aisles. So, this thought is on hold for now.)

4* A Wallet (because Google says so. And Google never lets me down you guys. But all the nice ones that I wouldn’t cringe being associated with are damn pricey and its January and he’s and ex and… I could go on but I’m sure you get the picture, yeah?)

5* Jigsaw puzzle (I am so so tempted to go with this option! I assume if you like crossword puzzles you must be on board with jigsaws too, right? I’m right. Oh God please don’t let me be wrong.)

So guys hope I figure it out in time. And wish me luck that no shady shenanigans go down!
Fortunately I have my outfit all planned out! But that's for another day!

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